9 Lessons of Life – In Quest of the Last Victory, 2nd Edition

9

Lessons of Life

A lot of my friends and followers from social networking websites have been requesting me to add my posts about my philosophies of life in the book, so that they could refer to them at one place. I have added this chapter here for the same reason. Let me add here that I do not make claims to absolute correctness of my thoughts. They are my learnings culled out from my experiences. Readers should only treat them as food for thought.

  1. People make their choices, you make yours.

    We are often bothered about and troubled by what choices others are making. We need to understand that just like us, others too have a right to make their choices. The only thing we have in our hand is, in light of the choice made by others or otherwise, the choice that we want to make. We should focus on making our choices.

  2. Insecure and weak minds resort to violence of words and action. A strong and learned man never resorts to violence of words and action. Defending yourself does not come under violence.

    Violence is when it is your intention to harm the other person, rather than to achieve any other objective.

  3. You have a right to your existence only if you have the courage to defend it.

    This is a law of life. If you do not have the courage to defend your own existence, the chances are that the world may not give you that right. While there are some chances that others may fight for you sometimes, but you cannot depend on that.

  4. Only a fool will betray an honest friend.

    There is no bigger asset in life than an honest friend. Only a fool will betray an honest friend for the sake of making small gains.

  5. The essence of life is to learn from pain and not to regret it.
  6. You cannot be emotionally generous to others when you yourself are emotionally weak and insecure.

    Only when you are emotionally strong and self-reliant you can be emotionally generous to others.

  7. I have often been asked “Does true love really exist?” or “What is true love?” My answer to them is that ‘True love is when you can love someone without expecting or wanting the same in return’.
  8. Life is a journey in search of truth. It is a journey, not an end.
  9. Opportunities don’t knock, you have to.
  10. When you find good people, good places, good thoughts and good things in life, grab them with both hands and don’t let go of them.
  11. Never regret the past, do not cling on to the present and always look forward to the future.
  12. India lives in villages and slums. It cannot be changed for the better at India Gate. Only those who are willing to go and work in villages and slums can change India for the better.
  13. Respect is the only religion. One who has not learnt to respect others has not learnt anything.
  14. You cannot possibly get happiness in life without giving it to others.

    People ask me ‘But what about ruthless dictators or psychopaths? Don’t they get happiness without giving it in return? My reply is: ‘They get pleasure. They don’t get happiness. They are not happy people.’

  15. I also believed in buying a plot of land for myself, then I realized that the whole world is mine, I don’t need to buy it from someone and I don’t need to conquer it either.
  16. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this world. Whatever is wrong is wrong with your perception of it.
  17. Emotionally weak and insecure human beings try to find security, strength and sense of achievement in belonging to bigger identities of caste, creed, race, region and religion.
  18. The unmistakable characteristic of the right path is that it will always take time and it will always be difficult.
  19. There is a loser in all of us and there is a winner too. It depends whom we choose to give importance to.
  20. The police and the government are easy scapegoats. We do not import the police and government; they are our brothers and sisters only. Today, no leader has the courage to tell the society that it is they who are wrong. And till that happens, the society can romanticize and fantasize a lot but it won’t change.
  21. If people’s laughing at you does not discourage you, one day you will smile.
  22. Success is a matter of choice. You choose to succeed or fail.
  23. Make your life a statement of belief in yourself rather than making it a compromise of sorts.
  24. Understand that ‘to judge this world’ is not part of your job profile.
  25. Life is not about how capable you are. It is about how determined you are.
  26. Nothing can make your success more probable than the absolute belief that you will succeed.
  27. Always carry lessons from life. Never carry regrets.
  28. If you are not willing to risk everything that you have at a certain level, you will never progress to the next level.
  29. You cannot be weak and expect justice to be done to you. Justice is commanded only by the strong.
  30. I am not here to change the world. I am here to just be myself and if that changes the world, I don’t mind.
  31. If you want to have sense, meaning and purpose in your life, unclutter. Remove 90 per cent of the unnecessary things from your mind.
  32. You may conquer people with your power but you can win them only with love.

    People who do not get love are much less unfortunate than the ones who do not know how to give it to others.

  33. Nothing can prevent you more from achieving your dreams than an excuse that you think is valid.
  34. There are no heroes in this world. There are no extraordinary people. We all are equally ordinary. It is only that some of us choose to consistently work in the direction of our dreams.
  35. If you are nice to other people, irrespective of whether they can do something for you in return or not, every person will add value and joy to your existence.
  36. A lion need not always roar, his silence is threatening enough. Rule your life, thoughts and destiny, as a lion rules the jungle.
  37. Understand that if you have lesser resources, lesser support and greater hurdles than anyone else, there are more chances than anyone else that you will succeed.
  38. Dream and work towards your dreams every single day.
  39. Whatever you do not give respect to in your life will not stay with you.
  40. Honesty is the only religion and Truth the only God.

    It is truth that runs this world.

  41. One who plays safe will also die. It is only that he will carry more regrets with him.
  42. I live with a belief that it is my destiny to succeed. Whether finally I will succeed or not does not even matter.
  43. The one who truly loves you and cares for you will always give you the option to say ‘No’ or to choose otherwise.
  44. If you are not happy with yourself, you cannot be happy with others.
  45. You do not become a winner and then behave like one. You behave like a winner and then become one.
  46. Success is not the act of crossing a line or achieving a target. Success is the attitude you carry.
  47. Desiring something is not wrong but making it a precondition for your happiness is.
  48. We do not have to live up to anyone’s expectations from us but to our own expectation from ourselves.
  49. That we have to die one day is not important. That we have to live before that is.
  50. Only allow that thought and that person inside your mind that deserves to be there.
  51. I do not regret that God gave me a tough job to do. I am glad he entrusted it to me. I would not have wanted it to go to someone else.
  52. Only that person will succeed who holds courage. Even God cannot change this law.
  53. Life is like music. You don’t need to hit too many notes at the same time. In fact you need only one—the right one. Life is a journey in the search for that right note.
  54. That which can go away is not love but interest.
  55. It has been a pleasure to have been born, to have opened my eyes to this world, to have got a chance to learn and discover. It has been a pleasure and an honour to have lived. Cannot be enough thankful for whatever little or more I may get. Thanks to all friends for having come into my life and for adding joy and beauty to it.
  56. Being in a motivated and positive state is a continuous process. Surround yourself with everything that is positive. Train yourself to believe in everything that is positive.
  57. Your principles are your biggest strength. If you are a person of principles, even your enemies will respect you.
  58. The only thing that can change this world for the better is education.
  59. Meticulous is the one word that can guarantee your success everytime.
  60. If you want to be joyful, don’t judge—not yourself, nor anyone.
  61. Be joyful towards life, be passionate towards work and be kind towards others.
  62. Let us be happy to begin with and then see where we can go from there.
  63. Doubt is the biggest enemy of your decision; Self-doubt is the biggest enemy of your success; Regretting the past is the biggest enemy of your happiness; Judging other people is the biggest enemy of your peace of mind.
  64. Your friend may deserve your love more but your enemy needs it more. It is more important to love your enemy and to show him your love.
  65. Love unconditionally. Do not put conditions to your love. When you put conditions you love only yourself and not the other person.
  66. If there is anything you really want to do or achieve in life, there cannot be enough reasons in this world to stop you.
  67. Our biggest battle is with ourselves and not with others. It is a battle with our shortcomings, insecurities and fears. One who fights with self will always win a lot and lose a little. One who fights with others will always lose a lot and win negligible.
  68. ‘Positive’ is the only way to move forward. Be positive in your aims, dreams and ambitions. Respond positively to people, situations and circumstances. Be positive about the outcomes of your endeavours and work towards the same.
  69. What matters in life is the people who love you and not those who don’t.
  70. Gratitude for what you have and not greed or regret for what you don’t is the key to peace of mind and happiness.
  71. I am a practicing humanist.
  72. The ultimate victory in this world is to achieve victory over self. If you have not achieved victory over self, all other victories will fade into insignificance.
  73. If we have faced losses and setbacks, we are fortunate because we have got an opportunity to prove ourselves. In the battle of life, the ones who win are not those who did not face losses and setbacks but the ones who go on despite.
  74. If you primarily focus on the good, doing good, being good and feeling good, the bad will take care of itself. You would not have to worry about it.
  75. I have a simple formula. I only look at things which can give me reasons to be happy, joyful and motivated. To be able to selectively look at such things is a habit you develop.
  76. We should do whatever little good that we can, wherever we can, in whatever small ways that we can, rather than waiting to do the big good that we intend to do but never end up doing.
  77. We are the reasons for our happiness; and we, not others, are the causes of our pain.
  78. The things we choose to strive for, the things we choose to give priority to have some rewards to offer and some prices to pay. Be glad to pay the price and don’t let rewards be the only aim.
  79. If you want to succeed, don’t give yourself an option to turn back or give up. It should not be an available option. If you give yourself an option to give up or turn back, in most cases than not, you will.
  80. There is nothing that makes us weaker than when we compromise with our decisions, choices and principles.
  81. There are so many people in this world who have so much less than us. We should be very respectful towards what we have and very respectful towards those who have lesser.
  82. I would anytime choose to suffer for my principles than gain from a compromise.
  83. The joy of giving is much greater than the joy of receiving.
  84. Right has a strength which wrong does not have. That is why the wrong needs to make a lot of noise to make its presence felt.
  85. Neither did Ram ever reside in a temple, nor Allah in a mosque. It is only the ‘human ego’ which resides there.
  86. Spend the times in your life as if these were the most beautiful times you ever had.
  87. India is an ideology that people of different faiths and beliefs, castes and creeds and regions and practices can stay together in peace and harmony and prosper. Success and failure of India is the success and failure of that ideology. If India can, the world can.
  88. Your happiness and your peace of mind is your moksha, your salvation. Nothing and no one should be given the right to take it away from you.
  89. Let us all always encourage and motivate each other to do better.
  90. Happiness is a frame of mind. You may discover it in the smallest of things or it may elude you with the world at your disposal.
  91. How people look at you is not your problem, it is their problem. Your problem is how you look at yourself.
  92. When I got ‘little’, little was much. When I got ‘much’, much was little. Thankfully, life taught me to appreciate. Thankfully, life taught me to be humble.
  93. There is practically no purpose of being if we cannot learn to love, respect and care for others.
  94. There are a lot of good people in this world and there is a little good in everyone. The good in the world needs to get connected and be expressed.
  95. The bad and the wrong massively lacks in numbers. That is why it is more aggressive and vociferous in expression.
  96. Usually we fight and shout when we are wrong. When we are right, in most cases we wouldn’t need to fight or even argue.
  97. We are all human beings. We have a little bad in us too. We have our shortcomings and drawbacks. But we should not allow our shortcomings to overpower or suppress the good in us—the little good that we can do, the good that we can be to others. Believe in being good wherever we can be.
  98. Do not be bothered about other people’s behaviour. If you are good yourself you will be able to bring out the best in everyone.
  99. Life will never meet you on your terms but yes, if you have the courage, you can deal with it on your terms.
  100. Be and let be.
  101. The problem is not that we do not do a lot. The problem is that we do not do a little.
  102. In this cycle of life, however badly we may want, we cannot play a bigger role than what we are destined to play and however hard we may try, we cannot play a lesser role either than what we are destined to play. So, stop worrying and do your work, do thy duty and live your life.
  103. It is important in life to have focus, else one can keep responding to a myriad of stimuli and end up reaching nowhere, not only in terms of achievement but also in terms of intellectual understanding and realization.
  104. The only thing we need, to spread happiness, is to be happy ourselves.
  105. When we look outwards, at others or otherwise, we find problems. When we look inwards at ourselves, our feelings, thoughts and responses, we find solutions.
  106. If we leave our prejudiced thoughts behind, there is a world of beauty and joy out there waiting to be discovered.
  107. Never hold anger. Anger and hatred may harm the person against whom it is directed but it will destroy the person who holds it.
  108. Love might not have conquered the world in the past but for the world ‘Love’ is still the only hope.
  109. If you choose to give up, you have only yourself to blame.
  110. When at a crucial juncture in life you are faced with a number of different options, choose the toughest one.
  111. Fighting over God and religion, disrespecting each other over religion and God, looking down upon each other over religion and God, is the rock bottom of human intellectual evolution.
  112. If you think that your region, race, caste, creed, colour, culture, religion and God is better than everyone else’s, you are no better.
  113. Every successful man has reached where he has because he thoroughly loved doing what he did.
  114. Life is a game of football. You can’t complain you didn’t get an empty field. You have to play against severe opposition and win and enjoy doing so.
  115. Success should not be a probability. Success should be a decision you take. Decide to succeed and give it your best.
  116. Being passionately in love with life is the best choice you have and the best choice you can make.
  117. Your destiny is not decided based on how you behave during your easy and comfortable times. Your destiny is decided based on how you conduct yourself during your tough and challenging times.
  118. God has given us the choice and ability to be sensible. If we choose to be otherwise, he is not to be blamed.