BEFORE WE GET THE DUCT TAPE, LET’S SEE WHAT NEEDS FIXING: NOTE, IT’S NOT THE KIDS
Let’s face it, parenting is challenging even on a good day. In my experience as both a mom and a professional parent educator with more than twenty years in the trenches, I believe parents are doing the best they can with the information they have. And that’s part of the problem. The information they currently have and the information they use to make the majority of their parenting decisions is based on a question I am asked a dozen times a day: “How do I get my kids to start doing this/stop doing that?” Parents across the country mistakenly believe that finding a strategy to “get” the kids to do or not do something is where they ought to be spending their time, energy, and money.
The problem is that the majority of the strategies parents employ to wrangle their kids into behaving don’t make things better for more than a day or two, which sends parents back out to find yet another “quick-fix” behavior strategy. Parents struggle to understand why the advice they received from a trusted friend, the article they saw on the Internet, the program with sensational testimonials, or the book they have read four times and highlighted until it glows in fluorescent yellow doesn’t deliver the kind of lasting and substantial change they are looking for.
New information and a new way of thinking are required if parents are to experience deep and lasting change. In this section, I will share five of the most common mistakes parents make and how a small shift in thinking, coupled with new information, can and will dramatically impact you, your kids, and the family as a whole.